In An Instant - How a Single Second Can Change a Life
Content warning! This is a blog post like no other, and not something I thought I would ever have to experience. I'll keep it brief but this weekend has included the worst thing I've ever witnessed - and, as you guys know, that is saying something.
H has been up to see me again, for a long weekend, bringing his usual suprises with him from the outset - lovely flowers again (my favourite gerberas and roses), and an extra surprise of perfume this time. Prada - and very nice too! The joke presents waited until we got home because I had one for him too. It was late when we got home from Glasgow airport - around 11pm Wednesday night, but there is always time for tea and gifts. There is a bit of banter between us about the shame of a Welshman dating an English girl, and Welsh pride - well they do have the best flag in the UK! H has a few flags from his various exotic travels and so he had said ages ago that he would get me a Welsh flag for Clacheranmor (to stake some kind of claim for the Welsh in the glen), and I could get him a Scottish one to hang in his cabin. So, it turned out that we had flags to exchange. He didn't get time over the next couple of days to fix me up a flag pole, so I've had a crack at it, although it's temporary, so that I could get those flags flying. He got me a Saltire, an Y Ddraig Goch (Red Dragon), a St George Cross and a Union Jack. They'll go up in that order - the order we visited those countries together in. The An Trídhathach (Irish Tricolour) will have to wait, but hopefully not too long... I'd also made him a very dodgy looking keyring is his family's own tartan - yes, the Welsh also have tartan and wear a very tidy looking traditional 5 yard kilt, which is on the list of things to get - he's got great legs for a kilt, along with the narrow waist and broad shoulders!
Thursday morning was a trip to the Build Depot in Dunoon to get some timber and tools to make a new gate to keep the sheep out of the garden. I had suffered half a dozen incursions over the last two weeks, including trying to chase one stubborn one out at midnight. The sheep won that night having charged at me, leaping over my outstretched leg and giving me the slip, and then stood outside my bedroom window and bleated for an hour, keeping me awake and summoning all its pals, so that when I woke up in the morning they were all there eating the hedge! Anyway, we got all the necessary items and I went off to work in the afternoon and came home to a fab looking new gate. It's got a temporary wooden baton catch for now with the intention to swap it for a hook and eye or even a bit of string like the farm gates, but actually I don't mind it as it is. I also came home to find H had fixed the lawnmower that had been refusing to run, and was mowing the garden in just his pants (pulled up into a thong), boots and outback hat (my favourite of all his hats!) What a sight - both hilarious and strangely attractive... I'm not sharing that photo - sorry guys!
Friday morning was spent being lazy in the sun on the patio while H worked and I brought drinks and pretended to read a book until I was sweltering and managed to convince H to join me for a swim at my favourite spot round the coast in Colintraive. I think the water is a beautiful temperature right now but H isn't used to it so there was some growling through gritted teeth while he powered through the discomfort of the cold water, followed by cramp in one leg that resulted in me being dunked and getting a mouthful of water. But once we were over the initial primal survival reflex (honestly!) he started to enjoy it. It was wonderful and I'm not sure he knows how much I appreciate these little moments of shared experience - simple things that mean a lot. After that I made lunch, which I am also enjoying - cooking for someone is another simple pleasure most people take for granted, and even dislike doing. I love being able to share meals, show off my domestic skills, feed him up with healthy food and introduce him to new things to try - which he gamely does every time. He's even enjoyed some of them...
After work we headed to Dave and Heather's for a lovely evening with a barbecue, funny stories and terrible jokes hilariously delivered. A lot of fun as always.
Saturday was finally my opportunity to get H out on the skiff and introduce him to the guys in the boat. He didn't quite get the full experience of an outing to a pretty bay with cake and tea, but he picked it up immediately and took part in some race training, followed by excellent (as always) cake and tea back at the boathouse. The reason for the short outing was that we had 11 people turn up for the morning so we did two short trips with seven people on each, followed by all hands on deck to clean the boat inside and then turn it over ready for cleaning and painting the underside to smarten it up a bit. H got stuck in of course and his muscle was appreciated for the lifting and turning.
After that we went for lunch at Colin and Sue's, which was another introduction for H (he's taking it all in his stride!), and had a delicious meal in their new lochside pod, with great views up the Kyles including a perfect sighting of the beautiful Waverley paddle steamer as it went by. Each time I introduce H to someone it reminds me how lucky I am to have so many truly wonderful friends I need to introduce him to! After that we headed back to the glen to watch Col-Glen shinty club play Oban - another first for H, and we bumped into three more people I knew and said hello. I decided we had done enough for one day and we called in at the McVicar's farm for steak to barbecue for dinner and afterwards we watched an episode of Yellowstone, which I've never seen before despite all the hype.
Monday was a bank holiday for Argyll and so we had planned to go and explore Gigha on Sunday and camp overnight on the beach, heading back on Monday. I had checked ferry times, checked what was open for food and made a plan of things to see and places we could pitch the tent. We packed our bags and some camping gear and put the pushbikes on the bike rack, hopped in the car and set off mid-morning. We set off in what is the longer way round, just because I hadn't set the satnav straight away due to there being no signal in the glen, and that small delay made all the difference to the day.
We were aiming for the ferry to Gigha via Tarbert, but about five miles north of Tarbert we came across an accident. We weren’t the first on the scene but it can’t have happened more than a minute or so before. We jumped out of the car and ran to help. We found two bikers who had been in a collision with a car and a third who was distraught and in shock. People were already on the phone to emergency services and were trying to talk to the guy who was consious and talking and less badly injured, but no one had tried to help the other guy who was consious but in a much worse state. I have never seen such horrendous injuries and I could see the inevitable outcome clearly. I begged a belt off someone and applied a tourniquet but there was so much blood. I hung onto it for a while until another, stronger chap came and took over, so I removed the man's glove and held his hand and talked to him. His breathing was becoming more laboured so I undid his helmet and he took it off himself, and I could see he was panicking. H took the third biker aside and listened and talked to him to try and calm him down. The ambulance took half an hour to get there and at that point we took our leave. I couldn't bear to see the rest. H washed the blood off my hands and we each made sure the other was ok. Having both lost people we love before their time this was a huge and upsetting thing for us both. We turned the car around unsure what to do next.
H is the master of spontaneity so he checked Google and found a ferry to Jura that we could get to and we set off for Tayvalich. What a gorgeous little village! A road that hugs a tiny, sheltered inlet with small boats docked amongst the rocks, one pub, a village hall, jetty for the ferry and a few white houses in the glorious sunshine. We parked the car, had our picnic lunch on a bench by the playing field and checked out the ferry times - we were ridiculously in luck - Monday, Wednesday, Friday and Sunday, but not until 6pm. And the return journey was 8.15am the next morning, so we wouldn't have long on the island. But we were here and we had nothing else planned, so we decided to go for it! We got the bikes and gear ready to go but we were limited in what we could take so the cushions and airbed got left behind, as did the breakfast cereal. H shouldered the heavy bag and I had a rack on the back of my bike so could take the tent and sleeping bags strapped tightly on. H's tyre needed some attention but once sorted we cycled to the pub and sat in the garden overlooking the bay. We had time for three drinks, three cans of coke (with rum) for me and three pints of local ale for H. At 5.40pm I got a call from the ferry captain asking where we were, and when I said at the pub (two minutes away - we could see the ferry from where we were sitting) he said to hurry up as they were leaving. We hopped onto the bikes and pedalled fast to the jetty and boarded.
The boat trip across to Jura was great - beautiful scenery, a little swell for excitement and the feeling of escape. But - as we had rushed from the pub we had forgone the use of the loo and as soon as we sat down we both agreed we needed a wee. I spent the whole journey in jeopardy and discomfort which took the shine off it a little. And half way there H noticed that the sleeping bags were getting wet from the spray off the water. As we arrived we hurried to the (only) hotel by the dock for the instant relief of an empty bladder. Once done we hung up the sleeping bag over the railings outside to dry off in the late evening warmth and headed inside for dinner, a drink and the FIFA world cup final match. We had a table with a perfect view of the football and watched while we ate prawns and featherblade beef, haggis bonbons and risotto, and H tried the Jura whiskey as is only right. As it was getting dark we gave up on the goalless game at full time and went to pitch the tent. As we cycled past sandy coves I spotted a group of four deer on the beach - two adult females and two smaller, younger ones. Unfortunately our brakes sqealed with the salt from the boat trip and scared them off before I could get a photo. We found a beautiful white sand beach spot, dotted with chamomile, with a flat grassy area above the tideline and set up the tent. I was a little cold, the ground was hard (obviously) and pillows were made out of a few rolled up clothes. H slept alright but I had to add an extra t-shirt and my aged hips kept going to sleep without the rest of me following suit - the accident was playing on my mind and I was worried about H. The wind picked up and a few geese flew in and out but otherwise it was all quiet.
Monday morning we got up with the sunrise to make sure we had time to get everything together for the ferry sailing at 8.15am. I had an invigorating dunk in the Sound of Jura, swimming with curious seals, and then we sat in the tent to admire the view and ate biscuits and fruit for breakfast, washed down with milk and orange juice. Then we packed everything up, hopped on the bikes and cycled the mile or so back to the jetty to await the boat. There was a little early morning life going on around us - a lorry or two at the distillery, one guy striding down the road in his tiny trunks for a morning swim, two campers quietly packing up their tent - but it was so peaceful sat on the sea front in the cool air and sunshine. We discussed and decided we would camp again but not without the mattress and pillows for comfort and insulation from the cold ground. We were the only people on the first sailing and the steward kindly made us a lovely coffee.
On the way back I Googled the accident from the previous day to find out if there was any news about the two gents. Unfortunately the guy whose hand I'd held and tried to comfort had died at the scene. I am desperately sad for the other two riders involved, the driver who will never forgive themselves, everyone involved in helping and especially the family of the chap who didn't make it. For me, I'm devastated that what we did wasn't enough to save him and it is yet another reminder of just how fragile life really is and that it can be snatched away at any moment. We chatted about it together and I think we are ok. H is a tough cookie, like me, and I think he was amazing in that terrible chaos when others were hanging back too scared to see. He did not hesitate, he was calm and so gentle and compassionate with those who most needed someone to be kind to them at such a desperate time. It is moments like this that you really see someone for who they are and he stepped up and I'm just full of admiration for him.
We drove the two hours home, had some lunch, packed up H's bag and then sat in the sun in the garden for an hour and did a calendar check and sync and bought me a ticket to the concert H is going to in October, so that's another exciting plan to look forward to. Then it was time to head back to Glasgow to say goodbye again. Heading to the airport was stressful as there was a big traffic jam that added half an hour to the journey, so we ran out of time to have dinner together in Paisley. H had to run to get through security (only to find the flight was delayed for 45 minutes!) So I went for fish and chips and finally got to try a battered Mars Bar, which I've been meaning to do for years - surprisingly tastes far better than it looks!
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